The light we didn’t know we had – Asking better questions
There’s always a way forward through ANY landscape …
To keep progressing, one of the most effective mindsets you can nurture is ‘taking the position that there’s always a way forward’. This post isn’t titled ‘there’s always something you can do’. Of course, there’s always something you can do. But the point is much stronger than that: ‘forward’ has direction. It has strength and commitment. Taking a stand for ‘a way forward’ is optimism in action – and it’s transformative.
Taking an intentional stand for good unfolding can also drive a sense of progress, even if it is just one small step along the path right at your feet. Progress is valuable even in small steps.
The research
It so happens that progress is one of the qualities necessary for real satisfaction at work. A study in the Harvard Business Review (ref) on the qualities of ‘good days’ versus ‘bad days’ found that almost 80% of respondents mentioned ‘making progress’ as a factor of a ‘good day’, which made it the most-mentioned factor by far. It’s nice when research confirms the ‘wisdom of the ages’. So why not take a stand for the idea that progress is inevitable. If that seems a little counter intuitive, think about developing a sense of ‘radical optimism’ – then hustle for it.
The principle
Taking a stand for a principle like ‘there is always a way forward’, whether for work or any other activities that matter to you, opens up extraordinary sources of creativity, possibility and action.
Here’s a true story about how being radically optimistic that one good thing would lead to another brought a surprising outcome – even in a situation so dark there was no landscape visible in any direction! It started with a very everyday question, “Have you got any tissue paper?”…
A few years ago we got completely lost on a small island in the Yasawas, a group of Pacific islands. Just before sunset, we went up through the rainforest and along a ridge to the top of the island to watch the sunset. It gets very dark very quickly in the tropics. We hadn’t taken a torch – it didn’t even cross our heat-addled minds that this might be a good idea – and on the way back down in the rapidly deepening twilight, we lost the path.For a few minutes, we thrashed our way down the side of a ridge in what we thought was the right direction, but it quickly became pitch black, and we couldn’t see a thing. We stopped – and it looked like we’d be there for the night. We couldn’t move. The ground was steep and the undergrowth impassably thick with vines, tangled around boulders. We could only crouch down where we were and wait for morning. We had no torch, no water and no insect repellent, just what we were wearing – T-shirts, shorts, shoes – and my first digital camera, with a flat battery. And we were somewhat afraid. Tropical rainforest isn’t without its creepy, stingy things.
We calmed down and reminded ourselves about the stand we take, that there’s always a way forward and it’s good. After we’d been crouching in the forest for about an hour, Frances said, ‘I don’t suppose you have any tissue paper in your pocket?’ Checking my pockets, I found the necessaries along with a spare battery for the camera. Spare battery? I’d completely forgotten I had it. Maybe we could use the flash on the camera to make ourselves a bit more comfortable.
By touch, I replaced the battery and flicked the camera on to use the flash, but to our total surprise, the faint glow from the small liquid-crystal display shed enough light for us to make out the tangle of vines we were stuck in and see how we could move forward. That camera was my first digital device with a screen – these days the idea of using it like a torch is obvious. So step by step, we found our way out to the coast using a light we didn’t know we had – one that showed up while we were looking for something else.
Work Passion Power: Strategies for a working life you love. p. 62
There’s nothing very special about asking if there is any tissue paper. That’s not the point. The point is the difference between “Sit still – we’re stuck for the night” and “There’s always a way forward – so what have we got ‘in the house’ that might be useful?” The principle seeds the question. The need for tissue paper was just a tiny catalyst.
The power of good questions
There’s a profound principle at work here that’s leveraged by radical optimism, by taking a stand for a positive future. It is this: the quality of your future depends on the quality of your questions. And here’s the diamond at the heart of this: you are in control of your questions. Absolutely. We are not trying to be smart here – the fact is that your questions are a powerful influence in shaping your future. Questions do this by guiding attention. You look where your curiosity, interests, hopes are pointing. What do you want to look towards? Where do you want to head? (If you have questions around these points Click here)
Not just problem-solving
A popular methodology is to look at problems that need fixing, at the gaps to be filled. And, oh! Almost forgot – goals. But these approaches are limited.
Problem-solving is essential, but it’s also a very incomplete strategy to ground your thinking ahead. We know it’s the season for annual reviews, but to be frank, it’s been a tough year and many of us would rather not think back over it too much … and sometimes these reviews are just a little boring.
Asking better questions
For now, forget the formality of annual reviews and goal setting, and ask some really simple questions, obvious things, and follow where they lead – be guided by the power of taking a stand for “There is always a way forward, and it’s got to be good”. Being a bit more specific, you might ask a simple question like …
What are five to seven ‘lights’ that have showed up for me unexpectedly over the last twelve months that I would like to keep shining going forward into 2022?
This is a great question. Not just for ourselves but to share with friends, family and colleagues. You could even consider questions like this as Christmas gifts! Just forward this page link to someone you know who would appreciate it.
Over the holidays, you will almost certainly be reflecting on 2021 at some point. Consider what you have enjoyed about the last year. Think about work and life more generally. And if they have collapsed together, think about what you have enjoyed about work-life! Don’t be stopped by the oddities and challenges we have all experienced with remote working and lockdowns.
What has moved or inspired you? They may be small things – but it’s absolutely not about size. It’s about savouring the sweetness of small joys and puzzling about how to keep them on your 2022 menu.
Your answers will identify values, qualities and aspirations worth taking into the new year. Your goals can then follow, and they will be the right goals.
Have a wonderful Christmas and New Year break!
All the best,
Max and Frances
P.S. If you want support with decision making about career, professional performance or workplace issues, call Frances